Monday, February 13, 2012

Cutest Cupid Ever

Happy Valentine's Day!

Sweet Smile


Sweet Cheeks!


I have the power to do what with this?!


It's pink.


Mr. February...Elijah Lee

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Suffering Well

Many of you know what's been going on with Robyn and Bryan and their babies, Asher and Titus. This morning, Robyn and Bryan came to church (it had been a long time since they were able to do that because of being on bed rest, etc.). Watching these two yesterday at Titus' funeral and then again this morning just blew me away. I mean, I knew they were strong, but really? They are the perfect portrayal of "suffering well."

Paul says in Philippians 3 that "7 But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. 8 Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ 9 and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith— 10 that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, 11 that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead."

With so much hurt in this world, it's so easy to slip into that selfish mindset of "Why?" forgetting that we are such a small piece of the larger puzzle. Our pastor told us about the analogy of the stain-glass window. We have our noses pressed up to it and can vaguely see the joyful, lighter colors and the gloomier, darker colors but only when we step back to see the entire design can we truly appreciate how God uses ALL of the colors and moods to create a beautiful picture that glorifies Him.

My sister-in-law, Erin, who is in Zambia wrote this today:

God took Emma today. Emma was 14 years old. She was born with aids and she had tb. She had ensiphylitis and meningitis. She was so, so so sick. She was beautiful and had so much personality...She loved for me to sing the lord is my shepherd to her. Her sponsors in the states loved her very deeply and when they saw her this summer they carried her little frail body to participate in the activities that the other kids were doing. They prayed fervently for her healing.
A friend reminded to me tonight that Emma did not die alone. She had a voice and god heard her cry of help and used family legacy to give her a childhood she would never have had. He took her, an orphan, and gave her a family. 100 children and 20 mommies who love her deeply. she was loved and she loved them. My Ellie prayed for her every night when we got back to zambia and saw how sick she was...Her sweet precious little body is no longer broken. She is with her saviour. I got to the hospital not long after she passed. It was awful, tragic and painful. I cant really put into words yet what it was like. That place is AWFUL. There is a stinch that you never forget. It emanates death. The realities of a life in a third world country being ravaged by aids and extreme poverty hit you hard in the gut. We were in the parking lot sending the great aunt home and talking to our family legacy zambian staff and There were two other women who ran out wailing. They had lost someone and were crying out in their native language why me, why is this happening to us? When Emma was in the picu, children were dying everyday. There would be beds filled and then emptied, not with healing, but death. We got there and her auntie was weeping. We gathered around her and held her and cried. I was overcome even more for the other moms and aunties that were there. You could see their eyes wondering if death was coming for them next. Her little body was still warm. But she was at peace and she wasn't begging me to take her home and to not leave her there. She was ready to go home... He did. I am heart broken. And I am so beyond thankful that she is home with her shepherd. I am so sad that the effects of this sinful world ravaged her precious body. My heart is so heavy tonight and i can't keep from crying. My god brings restoration. That is the phrase that keeps coming to my mind. God has restored her body, she is whole. She died with silver toe nail polish on her toes and i imagine she is dancing on them now, because she can.

I know that God is affectionately embracing sweet Emma and baby Titus. I had this beautiful picture in my mind right when Titus died that God was just sweetly holding his little body and giving him tons of kisses. Like Erin said, our God is a God of restoration. He is good and does good, even though we only see the smallest pieces of the stain-glass window. Life is hard and at times, it really sucks! However, I have to constantly remind myself in days like today (reading Erin's email and mourning the death of baby Titus) to rest in God's providence and know that He is bigger. He is better. He has a beautiful plan. He loves us more than we can even imagine. These are the truths that I hold onto.

So let hope rise,
And darkness tremble
In Your holy light,
And every eye will see
Jesus, our God,
Great and mighty to be praised.

God of all days,
Glorious in all of Your ways.
Your majesty, the wonder and grace,
In the light of Your name.

With everything,
With everything,
We will shout for your glory.

With everything,
With everything,
We will shout forth your praise.

*This is my new fave song (#1 on my playlist that's playing now): With Everything by Hillsong. We sang it at church this morning:)

Friday, February 3, 2012

God's Newest Angel

Just got home from the hospital seeing Robyn and Bryan and Baby Titus. Please read below and continue to pray for Baby Asher and this sweet couple! This was one of the hardest things that I've ever witnessed in my life...holding a precious newborn baby who has already gone to see our Lord...seeing Robyn and Bryan weep over this baby but in the same breath, sing praises that he is being held by God right now...their faith and super-human like strength are remarkable! Thank you so much for your continued prayers:)

Bryan said...

Thank you for all of your prayers. Titus Bauer Adams (Baby A) went home to be with the Lord shortly after he was born. He put up a major fight but his lungs weren't developed enough to make it. Asher Mark Adams (Baby B) is putting up a major fight and breathing on his own. He is 1lb 2 oz. but he is doing well right now. Robyn is still in the recovery room and trying to wake up but she's in a lot of pain. Please pray for her heart as we tell her about Titus. Please also pray that Asher continues to do well and survives. Please pray against any infection or birth defects. He has a long road ahead of him but he is a fighter and we believe that he will make it. Thank you again for all of your prayers. Our hearts are breaking right now but we appreciate all of your love and prayers. This is not the outcome we believed would happen but we know that God has a plan and that He is good!

Friday, January 20, 2012

Breathing in God's Grace


2012. A New Year. More time given to us from God.

This never fails to baffle me. Our pastor always has us stop everything we're doing and just listen to our breathing. The only reason why we are alive right now is because God wills it. He is the one who tells our hearts to pump and our lungs to fill with air. Everyday is another day of things to do, errands to run, meals to make, the list goes on; but I rarely stop and just praise God for allowing me to breathe and allowing me to have one more day with my family and friends.

This has become so much more evident to me through the trial that Robyn and Bryan Adams are going through. Robyn's on strict hospital bed rest at 21 weeks with her twin boys holding on like the little warriors that they are. One has little to no fluid in his sac. We've affectionately been calling him Jack Bauer because he has moved across the cervix as if to block it so he and his brother will not get out until they are good and ready! Everyday Robyn and Bryan and thankful for one more day with their boys and by God's awesome, unimaginable mercy, they have had almost 3 weeks with them since she had gone into preterm labor.

This verse below has become very real to me, because not only is every one of our breaths given to us by God but also our faith:

And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God. May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light.~Colossians 1:9-12

I am honored and so thankful that God has given me another day to see these faces:

and yes even this one (but just barely!)...